21K done!

The ABC Darwin Half Marathon 2011 – Check!

I ran the whole way, which was something I wasn’t expecting on doing or planning on doing, it just kind’ve happened. And I’m very pleased with that too. Beat my last years time of 3:10 (with an hour of walking!), and came in at 2:22 – also much better than I was expecting to do, so I’m very pleased. Even if I am now a cripple (my hips are KILLING!) and won’t walk for a few hours.

Have to tonight though… hot date with the lush of my life at the outdoor cinema!

Today, I ran naked.

Almost. Clothes, shoes, watch. That’s it. No iphone, no gps, no ‘man in my ear’, no music, no water. I just went. And I remembered how nice it was just to run for the sake of running – not because I have to do A TIME or A DISTANCE, just because. It was me and my rythym, and I missed it without realising it.

On Sunday, I think I’m going to leave the iPhone at home. I’ll take the pod just in case I get bored with my thoughts, but I don’t think I’ll need to use it. In this age of computers and smart phones and telephones and televisions and everything, it’s completely normal to stay ‘plugged in’ for days on end. In my case, months. Running sans gear enables my mind to daydream and wander – that little recharge that we used to get travelling on public transport, or on a smoke break, or just zoning out. If I felt myself getting stressed out (the old ‘But it’s so far’ ‘But I’m thirsty’ crap 15 minutes in!), then I can just count my paces to center myself, and before long, I’m off in la-la land again.

As it was, I ran slow. 7 mins a kilometre, when I know I can do faster. Meh. I don’t care right now… being the fastest isn’t my goal, and that’s not why I’m doing it. I’m doing it because I can, because I want to. And because I’m going to finish. Last year I ran a half marathon with much less training than what I’ve done now. Maybe one day I’ll take it seriously and train with the big kids. Right now, I’m doing it for fun. I get enough stress in my life without having my ‘fun’ activity stressing me out more.

this week’s been hard…

and I’ve no particular excuse for it. My eating’s been okay – bar the fact I have to give up dairy, but hey, it’s only two weeks, right?, my K’s are down, but hey, whatever… I have just felt particularly BLEH for the past two days. Low on iron perhaps? I’ll have to up my intake I think, just in case.

I feel better today than I did yesterday – for the first time in simply ages, I didn’t even want to go for a run yesterday. I wasn’t sick, I just was on ‘E for enough’. And hungry. I nibbled and munched all day. Surely that little sliver of choc mud cake the day before wasn’t to blame? No. I can’t think such things, I just can’t. The thought of having to deny myself of every pleasure for the rest of my life would be too much.

I’m doing pretty damn good I think, all things considered. I have had 4 slices of rye bread in 3 weeks, and apart from wraps, sweet potato and oats, that’s the biggest carb fest I’ve had. I’ll eat some pasta before the halfa and gu during it – that’s allowed. Maybe it’s because I said I’d never felt better? Maybe some irritated celestial being was suitably pissed and decided to teach me what for? Maybe I ran out of stuff I’m supposed to burn? Don’t think so, the diet guru didn’t seem to think it would be an issue for me.

I’m hoping that it’s just a lack of iron slump, and that I’ll be good to go on Sunday. I managed to do it last time with less training, so I’m sure I can do it this time. The only person I have to beat is myself, and simply by starting, I shall achieve one of my goals for the race!

Why am I doing this?

**reblogged fm my tumblr…

Over the years, I got larger, as many many people do – like millions of others I had a child, I gave up smoking, I had periods of stress in my life.

However, I have watched what I have eaten for many years, and while not *perfect*, I knew in myself it was pretty good (for lack of another word) – balanced, lower fat, lower carbs etc.etc. Over the last 3 years I have been exercising regularly, but it has increased over the last six months (due to picking up the running bug in my own time!), and I have been making a more determined effort to eat better/less/exercise more.

I’m overweight. Unhealthy weight. Unhappy weight. I wanted it gone, so I could hopefully be around for a few more years (it’s amazing what having a younger lush in your life does!). I have never lost weight easily. I am the kind of person who can starve themselves, exercise like crazy, and nothing budges. I worked super hard, and I lost 5kg in 6 months. While this in itself was amazing, I’ve never worked so hard or so long at this before – I knew what I was putting in, and I knew what I was putting out, and the two weren’t compatible. It’s just not fair that people can lose 20lbs in a month by having meal replacements, or by giving up coke, or junk food. I’m sorry, I’m really happy for people that can do that, truly I am, but on the inside I think ‘Why not me?’ Why can I eat sweet fuck all and run 12K and not lose weight?

So I went to my doctor and said ‘Enough’. So she sent me to the nutrition guru. Who told me that there was something wrong with the way my body processes glucose, and that there was something that we could do about it. I almost cried. For once, someone wasn’t just saying ‘Eat less, exercise more’, or ‘Eat this’, ‘Don’t eat that’. There was actually something wrong with me. And it can be fixed. I’ve never been a person for fads, or exclusionary diets (ie. The Paleo Diet Challenge by 125 got the ass 6 days in!), and like I said my diet is very balanced, but then he explained that I had to not eat certain foods to teach my body to use what it has already.

For two weeks, I had to give up starches and sugar. No flour, bread, rice, pasta, sugar, juice, cordial – a little fruit. I had to increase vegetables (you tried eating 3 cups of vegetables with dinner lately? Waaaaay more than what I’d usually eat!), eat macadamia nuts and yoghurt daily. And I lost 3.5kg in the first week. For a while there, I thought that I was going to have to go back and say I was starting to feel like a chemo patient, but then in the second week, the weight just blipped up and down half a kilo or so… Today I had my review. And today I was reminded about my post nasal drip, and asked if it had gotten worse. Yes it had actually, a few days last week it was bad during running in the morning, and this morning – but I put that down to a glass of milk I had yesterday evening. One glass. In two weeks. Then he said ‘How would you feel if I told you that post nasal drip is stopping you from losing weight?’. I couldn’t lie. I had to say ‘Pretty fucking crumby’. A teeny wedge of Brie has been my treat to me. Gotta stop. The yoghurt I had to eat for afternoon tea? Gotta stop. Along with white coffee. The meal replacements I was allowed to eat if I was too busy/lazy to eat real food? Gone. Fuck it. At least I have been doing the soy thing on my oats, and I can drink black coffee. And green tea. Think I’m going to start putting gin in the diet though…

Once we know how various foods affect me, then we can start putting stuff back in. I’m not going to be doing this forever, it’s all about learning what makes me function better. You know what? I feel the best I’ve felt in years. Mentally and physically. My body is not so creaky, and I know I can do more, because I can do anything! It’s not all about losing the weight, that is just the indicator that something is not right, and I’m going to fix it.

I got this shit.

Two more weeks!

And this time, I’m not allowed milk either.
And that includes milk products, such as cheese and yoghurt. And no meal replacement shakes either, as they’re milk based… Which shits me, cos they were so easy to grab in a hurry!

*sigh*

Apparently post nasal drip = no weight loss. Weird huh?

Two weeks are up!

Two long weeks of no bread, no rice, no potatos, no sugar, no cordial, no fruit juice… I’ve had 2 pcs of rye bread ( allowed to eat, just chose not to), a few bits of fruit here and there, and one martini.

I’m pretty pleased with myself, and I like the fact I feel really good- how is it my bones ache less? My head is clearer and I feel I can focus better, but I’m not sure how much of this is physical, and how much is mental. And I did loose weight, which means we’re on the right track.
Long way to go yet, but it’s moving in the right direction at last! And why do I think he’s going to tell me to keep it up for the rest of my life?

stupid tumblr

I want to tell everyone that the movie the lush of my life and I were going to see last night was put off until next Sunday night – the night of the race. Hopefully I can drag myself from the car to the deckchair for it, cos I’m not missing either of them!

We had a lovely meal last night – far too much on the plate though, and it was hard to say no to all the chips, particularly after being at the show yesterday as well and having to pass up all the once a year foods I’d usually indulge in. *sigh*

Most interesting is the fact that if I don’t exercise, I don’t lose weight. I think there’s something wrong with that picture, so I will speak to the nutrition guru when I see him on Tuesday. It’s not that I’m being greedy, it’s just wrong in my opinion. And it’s taken me 20 bloody years to say that ‘This is bullshit’ to someone who is actually in a postion to make that call, and to have them say ‘Yes. Yes it is. Lets try this…’, is too fantastic an opportunity to pass up. Hopefully he’ll have some other ideas, but I’m just going to keep chugging away at it.

Oh, and I’ve worked out that gin and vodka don’t have sugar in them. . .

But after the race next week, I’m still having beer. To replenish myself, of course!