Woke up exhausted today…

and despite waking just about every night for hours, and usually waking up tired, this was an absolutely exhausted waking.

I’m not mentally in a bad place, so it can’t be depression or variants thereof… and I certainly haven’t done anything physically taxing, which is a different ‘in your bones’ exhaustion… it’s a more of an ‘I’m completely fucked and can’t move my ass’ kind of exhaustion. The only thing I can put it down to is my eating habits of late – although generally healthy, I’ve not been eating anywhere near enough greens or vegetables in the past week.

I was sposed to be going to the gym with my friend today. I spent an hour devising a nasty routine yesterday. It took me half an hour to drink my coffee. I don’t *feel* sick, but I really want to roll over and sleep again, so I begged off. We’re buying a new car today – that should be exciting enough for anyone, but I want to put my head under a pillow… The man of my dreams made me breakfast. Liver and bacon and onions, and although I wasn’t hungry (which is wrong, cos it’s past breakfast time), I took a mouthful and chewed. And it was the best breakfast ever, and I devoured the lot in minutes – so I’m thinking ‘Maybe I’m not eating properly, and maybe I need to keep an eye on that’.

I’m still tired, but I think I can function. Hell, I hope so. We’ve got a car to buy!

 

Today

I’ve spent trying to eat more. Two beers at the end of the day, and I just feel like a) a blob, and b) a failure. I don’t want dinner. I’m not hungry.

Please stand by while we rectify the problem…

I did squash for ,almost an hour by myself – I worked out you get to run twice as far, but you have an advantage in knowing where the ball should go. Cancelled by the fact you can’t hit the damn thing straight anyway, and multiplied by the wussy hits. All in all? I know what the sore spot is on the heel of my hand now… And I get better every time I hit the damn thing.

What a day!

I’m glad that’s over. After starting far too early, spending all morning standing up or kneeling, scarfing lunch in 20 mins, I went and did squash drills for half an hour (notice I’m using the term ‘squash drills’ to 1. Imply that I know what I’m doing, and 2. That I’m actually good enough to be repeating stuff for practice. Neither would be actually true. And I’m not putting a disclaimer on here!) That was enough…

I’m tired. Tomorrow is a whole day of standing and kneeling, so I don’t know what I’ll do for an activity. Maybe I’ll go for a swim and try out that 75m objective?